Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize