her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
