Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize