I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
sex in a hospital.. check
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
