peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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