I looked at my own cervix.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with two different species that night
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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