just tell him i said nine months
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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