Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
