i jhust puked up my retainher.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
