Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
