she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
