you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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