hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast