...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.