You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
