google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
