Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
