Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
