Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize