I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize