i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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