I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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