so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
