This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
