You're completely useless in the revolution.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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