What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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