does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
