Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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