we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
