Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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