1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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