I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize