No stitches, just platelets and will power
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
