if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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