We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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