no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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