I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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