I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
