dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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