How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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