evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
