Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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