coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize