I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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