is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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