I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize