Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Semen is not good for contacts.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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