Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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