If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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