Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
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I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
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I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize