this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
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